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第53章 我的四种生活(2 / 3)

a youngster with the imagination and empathy and thoughtfulness to always phone when a late arrival might cause worry...to always know how to reassure? How can I repay the one who dashed into adulthood far too young but has carried all of its burden with a firm, joyous spirit?

My job itself is a reaffirmation of that by which I live. Very early in my working life, I was a small cog in a big firm. Emerging from a tiny job, I found a strange frightening world. Superficially everyone was friendly, but beneath the surface were raging suspicion, distrust, the hand ever ready to ward off or deliver the knife in the back. For years I thought I was in a world of monstrous people. Then I began to know the company’s president. What he had been I have no way of knowing. But at seventy he was suspicious, distrusting, sure that no one was telling him the truth; he had developed a technique of pitting all of us against each other. Able to see the distortion he caused, I youthfully declared if I ever ran a business, it would be on the reverse principle.

For the last two years I have had that opportunity, and had the job of watching people widely different people, too learn to understand each other, accept each other, feel mutually responsible.

My trials and errors have really synthesized into one great belief which is that I am not alone in my desire to reach my fellow man. I believe the human race is inherently co-operative and concerned about its brother.

生活中的我扮演着四个角色——妻子、母亲、员工及社会的一员。没错,角色各不相同,但它们之间的衔接很紧密,这就归功于两种主要的支配力量:一是尝试去发现、理解并接受他人;二是相信自己应对他人尽责。第一种力量起源于我儿时与父亲“出演”莎士比亚戏剧的时候。无论是哈姆雷特沉思时的独白、麦克白夫人的梦呓,还是伍思里主教的自我剖析,父亲都不允许我死记硬背,而是从有趣的游戏中教我理解诗句背后人物的内心活动。

大学时代,一位教授的亲身教诲,进一步加强了我对他人本质的强烈好奇心。他让我懂得如何将这种强烈的好奇心转变为对他人的关爱与尽责。这种责任心是源于对我所有知识的欣然回报,而并非基于卡尔文教派的严格信条。

我相信,人如果无法接受自己,就不可能接受并善待他人。我了解到我们每个人都有长处与短处,至于这种了解始于何时何地,我已无从知晓。但是,在近30岁时,我学会了对内心的冲动予以承认,而非痛苦地掩饰。我轻松地面对它们,因为它们既非我独有,也并非难以控制。

每一天,我都生活得充实而快乐,这便是对我人生哲学肯定的证明。这种理念自然也适用于婚姻生活。任何真正的婚姻都是基于夫妻间不断地相

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